The Big Gundown (1966)

Ready to hear some really deep thinking? Sure you are. The Big Gundown, aka La resa dei conti, was written and directed by a guy named Sergio. Therefore it’s good. Why do I say that? Well, Fistful of Dollars, For a Few Dollars More, The Good, The Bad and The Ugly and Once Upon a Time in the West were directed by Sergio Leone. Django, The Great Silence and Companeros were directed by Sergio Corbucci (totally giving this guy a pass on The Hellbenders, which sucked). So, by that logic The Big Gundown, directed by Sergio Sollima should kick ass (especially with the soundtrack being put together by one of the greatest composers ever, Ennio Morricone). That would be correct. The Big Gundown fits easily into my top 10 spaghetti westerns and it’s one hell of a fun ride.

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Severed Ways: The Norse Discovery of America (2007)

When I pop in a film about Vikings, I expect to be lost in a land of hardships, battle, destruction, etc. When I popped in Severed Ways I got a boring 109 minute sequence of random shots, a story that couldn’t have actually been more then twenty pages long, and poor excuses to drop some death metal into this cinematic brain fart. Are there worse films out there? Oh, I’m sure there are, but Severed Ways makes Rob Zombie’s Halloween look like an Oscar-caliber flick, and that’s saying something considering I think Halloween (2007) is one of the worst horror films I’ve seen of late. Yes, Severed Ways has Vikings (2 of them) and yes, there’s a few scenes of action (maybe 4 minutes out of it’s ridiculously bloated running time), but over 100 minutes of random shots of woods, guys sitting around and cutting down trees, a film does not make.

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Shogun Assassin 3: Slashing Blades of Carnage (1972) – DVD Review

Shogun Assassin 3: Slashing Blades of Carnage sure as hell lives up to its name. From the opening sequence, to the finale, Shogun Assassin 3 is the most brutal of the first three Shogun Assassin films, as well as the fastest paced. Ogami’s honor is put to the test and his son is used as a tool to lure the great swordsman into a battle bigger then anything he could have ever imagined, and what a visual treat it is!

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Goemon (2009)

I just had the absolute pleasure to witness a sensory feast of a film called Goemon from visual master, Kazuaki Kiriya. I have to say that Goemon may be one of the most ridiculously entertaining films I’ve seen in a long time. Its fractured story-telling, video game-reminiscent CGI, and unorthodox attitude (to us westerners) should have made it a sure-fire bomb, but instead it turned out to be a visual treat and one hell of a rollercoaster ride.

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Shogun Assassin: Lightning Swords of Death (1972) – DVD Review

Once again, Ogami and Daigoro are back on the road, and this time things are getting a bit more complicated. When we last left the father and son team they had defeated ‘The Masters of Death” and now a proposition has been made. What follows is another round of blood, swordfights, nudity and double-crossing that only a film in the Shogun Assassin series could bring. It rocks!

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Shogun Assassin (1980) – DVD Review

I’ve heard a lot about a little film called Shogun Assassin (and even some about the sequels in the series), but until now I hadn’t had a chance to give it a watch, and I’m kicking myself for not watching it sooner. If you want a straight-ahead samurai revenge flick with almost nonstop action, adventure and violence, then this may just be the flick you’ve been waiting for. Blood, sweat and a few boobs thrown in for good measure, Shogun Assassin may have been made way back in 1980, but it sure as hell looks great.

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The Executioner, Part II (1984)

This flick’s so bad I couldn’t even find snazzy box art to put up!

If The Executioner, Part II hadn’t been included in the Grindhouse Experience box set, I very much doubt that I would have ever gotten around to watching it (OK, I lie, I probably would). I don’t know if it was genius marketing, or just desperation, but the title seems to imply that it’s a sequel, but I don’t know what the hell it would be a sequel to. So, not only do they snag you with some fancy cover art, but they hook you with the promise that the premise was good enough to have worked once before. Well, I doubt very much that there is more than one film in this series as it’s absolutely atrocious.

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Barbarian Queen (1985)

Swords and Sandals flicks can be extremely entertaining. Hell, Conan the Barbarian proved that way back in ’82. Yet, the ones that fail, fail hard. Barbarian Queen proves that. In a film with as much violence and nudity as Barbarian Queen gives the audience, the last thing on viewers’ minds is that they’ll be bored, but, that’s exactly what this reviewer dealt with (fighting to stay awake).

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Since the review’s epically short, here’s the final battle in it’s entirety.

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Zatoichi: The Fugitive (1963) – DVD Review

You’d think that after four films, the Zatoichi series would be slowing down. You’d be wrong. Heck, this bitch is just getting fired up. We’ve watched Zatoichi grow from just a random, wandering blind swordsman to an honor-driven defender of the weak, and he’s not done yet. Zatoichi: The Fugitive, or Zatoichi kyojo tabi, brings to light an entirely different side of Zatoichi that we hadn’t seen before, and, it’s actually a pretty scary thing to witness.

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New Tale of Zatoichi (1963) – DVD Review

Zatoichi’s back, in his third big screen adventure, New Tale of Zatoichi. And, guess what, kids? He’s in color. The third film in the series sees our blind masseur hero in full color, ready to kick some butt and take names. This film is different from the first two as we see Zatoichi returning to his roots, but he’s going to learn that sometimes you can’t run from your past.

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Thunderbolt Fist (1972) – DVD Review

I’m a little sad (and embarrassed) to say this is my first Shaw Bros movie. I claim to be a martial arts movie fan and have missed some of the biggest movies out there in the genre. I took me a while to watch this one. It kept getting pushed back for other movies but I wish I had gotten to it sooner as it was pretty damn entertaining. Read on for the full review.

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The Tale of Zatoichi Continues (1962) – DVD Review

The Tale of Zatoichi Continues (which is actually the name of the second film in the Zatoichi series) is pretty much a continuation of the first film (as is stated in the title). The blind swordsman is back and this time at action is amped up. Shintarô Katsu is back as the title character, and in this sequel secrets are about to come out regarding his past and it may just come back to haunt him.

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Not a trailer, but one of the many beat-downs Zatoichi hands out.

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The Tale of Zatoichi (1962) – DVD Review

The Tale of Zatoichi, aka Zatôichi monogatari, is one of many samurai films to come out of Japan. Only this one was a little different. It inspired over 25 sequels and “upwards of 100 TV episodes” (says the back of Zatoichi box set I have). That’s pretty impressive for any genre. Enough about everything that followed it, the focus here is on the first film in the series, and, what a great way to open it. We’re basically treated to a different version of the Yojimbo story where a wandering swordsman (Zatoichi) enters a village and finds himself in the middle of a feud between two rival gangs. What makes this so different? Zatoichi is blind and kicks more ass than most men with sight ever could.

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Yes, it’s subtitled in Spanish. Sorry about that.

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Wanted (2008)

 

 

Wanted is directed by Timur Bekmambetov (Nightwatch/Daywatch) and stars James McAvoy(Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, Last King of Scotland), Agelina Jolie (c’mon, you don’t know who she is?), and Morgan Freeman (worse than not knowing Jolie).  The film is about a normal, everyday accountant that gets himself mixed up with a band of assassins.  He in turn, joins said group and all hell breaks loose.

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Hard Target (1993)

Hard Target is John Woo’s (The Killer, Hard-Boiled) criminally under-appreciated first Hollywood film. With an excellent cast including van Damme (rocking a monster mullet), Lance Henrickson (Aliens, Pumpkinhead), Arnold Vosloo (The Mummy, Blood Diamond) and Wilford Brimley (DIABEETUS!!), Hard Target is fairly well acted for a b-level action movie. There’s gunfights galore, explosions for no reason, a bit of martial arts, and it’s John Woo so you know van Damme is jumping through the air whilst firing two guns. (Yeah, that’s a Hot Fuzz joke. So what?)

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Ricki-Oh: The Story of Ricky (1991)

Everyone enjoys a good action flick. I don’t care if you’re a gorehound that loves watching zombies tear the flesh off of nubile women while they try to get their freak on with the dumbass boyfriend that was hired to simply lay under the actress while she gyrates in every direction. Maybe you like when the totally undeserving waste of life jerk figures out that his life is meaningless without the simple, small-town girl, that he just bailed on for a night of anal with the hookers down the street. In either case, you enjoy action films once and a while. That brings us to the topic of this review, Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky. That’s right. The film’s so badass that they used the main character’s name twice in the title (thanks Edgar Wright for pointing that out). And, while the title may not exactly let the audience know what they’re in for, I can tell you that once you’ve seen Ricki-Oh, you’ll never be the same.

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JCVD (2008)

Jean-Claude Van Dame the Muscles from Brussels! He is the action hero of the 90’s who brought John Woo to Hollywood with Hard Target, traveled through time in Time Cop and beat up Powers Boothe in a hockey rink while a helicopter came crashing through the roof in Sudden Death. Now he’s making a come back and never could there be a better time to see this whole other side of Jean-Claude as a regular guy in JCVD.

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Silent Rage (1982)

“The king of martial arts versus a bionic killing machine!”

 

“In the hospital of a small town, three doctors experiment on a man called John Kirby. As a result, John becomes a mute maniacal murderer with the ability to heal automatically every time he gets injured, no matter how bad it is. When he starts killing everyone he crosses, the town’s sheriff goes after him; but how can he stop someone who can’t die, or even get hurt?”  

 

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Shinobi: Heart Under Blade (2005)

If someone told Japanese author Futaro Yamada that his book The Kouga Ninja Scrolls, written in 1959, would become a multimedia explosion some 45 years later, I’m sure he wouldn’t have believed it. But that’s exactly what happened to the material, which is certainly ripe for the picking. A Romeo and Juliet style story set in the midst of rival ninja clans with magical powers is beyond awesome in my world. Obviously others agreed, and in 2003 it was turned into a 5 volume manga series entitled Basilisk, followed by a 24-episode anime series of the same name in 2005. That wasn’t all however, as at the end of the anime’s run, a theatrical live-action film was released, under the name Shinobi: Heart Under Blade. Apparently the subject matter can do no wrong, as the film is pretty much on par with everything that came before it.

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Beowulf (2007)

After creeping me out with the dead-eyed characters of Polar Express, Robert Zemeckis takes another stab at a film populated entirely by CGI. This time, he tackles the Old English epic poem, Beowulf. While the film does contain fair amount of the source material, writers Neil Gaiman and Roger Avary made some changes to get it to the big screen. Paramount released the Blu-Ray today, so let’s check out the trailer and then after the jump, check out my review of Beowulf.

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The Hellbenders (1967)

Sergio Corbucci has directed some of the most entertaining and solid spaghetti westerns ever made, bringing the audience such classics as Companeros, Django, and The Great Silence.  He has made a habit of capturing visuals with a breath-taking flair and using an awe-inspiring soundtrack to bring his films to the forefront of western mythology (hell, I’d put them in the same league as Sergio Leone).  However, for The Hellbenders it seems as if Sergio Corbucci was in a rush, and instead of an epic spaghetti western, the audience is left with a fragmented, poorly-made C-grade American western.

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The Great Silence (1968)

The Great Silence is yet another amazing Spaghetti Western from Sergio Corbucci.  TGS stars Klaus Kinski (Nosferatu, For A Few Dollars More, Slaughter Hotel) as Loco, the bloodthirsty bounty hunter as he faces Silence, played by Jean-Louis Trintignant, the mute gunslinger.  TGS is very different from both Django and Companeros as it is much darker in nature, and many, many times more serious than the others.  Corbucci really pushes the envelope as far as character, story and cinematography are concerned.  And, what great Spaghetti Western would be complete without music from Ennio Morricone?

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Django (1966)

Sergio Corbucci’s Django, to me, is one of the most rewatchable films, ever.  Not just as a spaghetti western, but in general, I could put this film on and never be bored.  The stories simple, the acting is solid and the pacing is almost perfect.  The soundtrack is superb thanks to Luis Enríquez Bacalov.  I can’t get that theme song out of my head!

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The theme for all of you interested:

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Compañeros (1970)

Compañeros is a solid effort from director Sergio Corbucci (Django, The Great Silence), bringing back Franco Nero (Django, Texas Adios, Keoma) to once again act in a Spaghetti Western with the talented director.  Also, least we forget, the incredible sound track is performed by Ennio Moricone.  With all of these things working for it, does Compañeros live up to its expectations?  Yes.  Is it the best spaghetti western ever?  No.  It is a great movie?  Yes.  It’s it Corbucci’s best?  No.  But, that doesn’t mean anyone that’s a fan of good cinema shouldn’t see this film.

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Chocolate (2008) – KamuiX

It seems as if Thailand is now the place to go for martial arts films featuring shockingly realistic fighting. This really came to the attention of the world at large with Ong-Bak, a film with fight scenes so intense that the legitimacy of them is still debated today. While I found the fights to be amazing in that film, the story left me rather cold. I really haven’t been back to the genre at all since then, but the premise of Chocolate, the newest film from Ong-Bak director Prachya Pinkaew, really caught my attention. I’m glad I gave this style of film a second chance, because to put it simply, Chocolate kicks ass.

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